Dear Baby:
This past weekend your dad and I went up to Portland for an annual event that the cousins on my mother's side take part in called "Cousin's Weekend". It started as "Girl's Week" back when I was a child. All of the girl cousins would come to Beaverton (where I lived til I was 14) and we all stayed in the motor home that your grandfather had parked next to our house. It was a glorious week where we would go to the park and watch movies and makeup dance routines, etc. I looked forward to it more than summer itself. And then, well, we all grew up.
And then, in 2005, your great Grandmother Lydia passed away. All of the cousins came together to mourn her passing and attend the services. And it was in hanging out again, now as adults, that we realized how much we missed each other. How much "checking in" once a year (at least) made us all better people. So we decided to include the boys and "Cousin's Weekend" was born.
The first year, your dad and I hosted in Los Angeles. All of us slept in our tiny 980 square foot home...happy as can be. The second year, Adi and Jake hosted in Seattle (you were a newborn so we missed that one...and we're still getting heat for it) and this past one was in Portland. Ana hosted. We all stayed in her adorable home. We drank wine and played charades til 4am. We talked and laughed and tried to catch up with each other in the short time alloted us. We toured the city and ate too much and hugged and couldn't believe how quickly the weekend flew by. It was glorious and I am honored to be a part of this family and so touched that everyone now makes this weekend an annual priority.
Now, the lesson. It's about being a good host and also being a good guest. Assholes don't know how to host or how to be gracious guests. Usually assholes are too selfish to host anything and are such poor guests that they are never asked back. So, it is very important to have you grow into an awesome host and guest.
An awesome host makes their home comfortable for their guests. They make sure their guests are well fed and hydrated. They make sure their guests are introduced to the other guests. They make people feel at home and make thier home a place that people hope to be invited to again and again. An awesome guest has jobs, too. First, they must always bring something. Even if they are told that they don't need to. Always bring a small gesture of gratitude at being invited into someones space, baby. A bottle of wine, flowers, a book, cupcakes. It doesn't have to be expensive. But it is a must in your mommys opinion. A good guest also says: "Please" and "Thank you" which is an area I have already covered. A good guest then has a good time. They don't sit in the corner making fun of people and they do participate in games and conversation with an open mind. Then, before they leave, they offer to help clean. It's simple. So, do that.
Love,
Mom
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Lesson #11: Slow Motion
Dear Baby:
Two days ago we took an afternoon walk.
Now that you're walking, you like to take these afternoon constitutionals. I walk next to you as you amble down the street pointing at the bird in the sky, the cat across the street, the college kid that rides by on his bike. You wave at the passersby and stop to smell the flowers. Literally. Taking that walk with you two days ago was glorious. Two houses down, a woman and her two sons came out of their home with two dogs. A little dog and a big dog. You love dogs. So, you got very very excited seeing them approach. Now, I've lived in this house for over five years, baby, and in all of that time I have never met the woman that lives two doors down. Her name is Shelly. I know that now because of you.
I am not someone who stops to smell the flowers, baby. I'm a worker. I make goals and I achieve them. I don't talk to the neighbors unless I have to. Not because I'm not friendly. But because I don't have time. Time is always the enemy. I never have enough of it. It's like my heroin as I'm always chasing it. But now...it's different. You have shown me the value of pausing. No, it's not even pausing...it's moving in slow motion. It's leaving my cell phone with it's instant messages, emails and twitter. It's leaving the rat race to move in slow motion with you. It's smelling the flowers and looking at the birds and waving at the college student on the bike and meeting the neighbors...finally.
We came home from our walk and ate a dinner of turkey, endemame, carrots, avocado and raspberries. I gave you a bath and put you in the polka dot footsie pajamas. I read you "Pat the Bunny" and "Goodnight Gorilla", gave you a few ounces of milk and then put you into your crib with your light pink bunny nee-nee. I said "Good Night" and you waved at me as I blew you a kiss from the doorway to your bedroom...and the next morning was my first day back at work. Back to the rat race.
But I'm changed. Happier, peaceful, more clear. And I'm pretty sure it's because of that walk. So, the lesson today, sweet baby, comes from you to me. Sometimes moving in slow motion gets you much further ahead. Thank you for the lesson.
Love, Mommy
Two days ago we took an afternoon walk.
Now that you're walking, you like to take these afternoon constitutionals. I walk next to you as you amble down the street pointing at the bird in the sky, the cat across the street, the college kid that rides by on his bike. You wave at the passersby and stop to smell the flowers. Literally. Taking that walk with you two days ago was glorious. Two houses down, a woman and her two sons came out of their home with two dogs. A little dog and a big dog. You love dogs. So, you got very very excited seeing them approach. Now, I've lived in this house for over five years, baby, and in all of that time I have never met the woman that lives two doors down. Her name is Shelly. I know that now because of you.
I am not someone who stops to smell the flowers, baby. I'm a worker. I make goals and I achieve them. I don't talk to the neighbors unless I have to. Not because I'm not friendly. But because I don't have time. Time is always the enemy. I never have enough of it. It's like my heroin as I'm always chasing it. But now...it's different. You have shown me the value of pausing. No, it's not even pausing...it's moving in slow motion. It's leaving my cell phone with it's instant messages, emails and twitter. It's leaving the rat race to move in slow motion with you. It's smelling the flowers and looking at the birds and waving at the college student on the bike and meeting the neighbors...finally.
We came home from our walk and ate a dinner of turkey, endemame, carrots, avocado and raspberries. I gave you a bath and put you in the polka dot footsie pajamas. I read you "Pat the Bunny" and "Goodnight Gorilla", gave you a few ounces of milk and then put you into your crib with your light pink bunny nee-nee. I said "Good Night" and you waved at me as I blew you a kiss from the doorway to your bedroom...and the next morning was my first day back at work. Back to the rat race.
But I'm changed. Happier, peaceful, more clear. And I'm pretty sure it's because of that walk. So, the lesson today, sweet baby, comes from you to me. Sometimes moving in slow motion gets you much further ahead. Thank you for the lesson.
Love, Mommy
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